My Top 100, No. 23: "Thrash Unreal" by Against Me!

I don't really like punk that much.

I never had that anti-authority streak when I was a kid, or when I did, it wasn't as brazen or angry. And insofar as I valued nonconformity, I didn't value noncomformity for its own sake, or consider conforming to some non-preppy ideal to be true nonconformity. And from a political perspective, I was never interested in tuning in, turning on and dropping out, nor did I think that just tearing down an existing and objectionable institution was a worthwhile goal--you've got to want to build the next institution in its place. Which most kids who were into punk didn't think much about because all they wanted to do was get stoned and draw anarchy signs on anything that would sit still long enough.

I just never got it.

So when a few of my friends started listening to Against Me! in college I just kind of rolled my eyes and went back to listening to The National or Black Kids or whatever else I was into at the time. But I remember vividly the first time I heard "Thrash Unreal." I was home from school, and a friend of mine had taken me to a party with a bunch of his friends from Rutgers-Camden, which I mention because--and this post is making me sound elitist as hell, and I'm sorry about that, but I'm just being honest--it was a characteristically Piney hipster experience, just a lot of people hanging around a house with wood-paneled walls and carpet older than I am, talking about being in and from South Jersey, because it's the only thing we'd all experienced, while eating Wawa hoagies and pounding back Yuengling and PBR.

And the music was there for most of the night, but not in any conspicuous way, until someone brought up Against Me! and turned on "Thrash Unreal." I didn't know the title of the song for years afterward, but the chorus, the "Bah bah bah, bah bah ba-da-da-da!" stuck immediately and indelibly in my mind, not just because of how catchy the tune is, but because of how into it all those people were.

Years later, I got crap from a colleague for not liking Against Me! and it reminded me of that one house party, at which I remember people singing along to something about Florida...? So I keyed up "Sink, Florida, Sink," which definitely had some sing-alongy parts, but was not it. So I went back and listened to about 15 different Against Me! songs until I found the one I was looking for: "Thrash Unreal."

I still don't like Against Me! that much, but "Thrash Unreal" is an absolute jam. The palm-muted power chords into the first verse are like a prophecy of what's to come--in the universal pissed-off-white-kid language, it means that even if shit's quiet now, it won't be for long--and the "Bah bah bah, bah bah ba-da-da-da!" that I remembered actually covered up a magnificent countermelody.

And the song itself is, appropriately enough, about struggling to grow out of a life of partying and becoming a functioning adult. It almost idealizes the traditional, which is not something I'd have expected from a punk band that started out so angry, but I guess everyone has to grow up sooner or later. What I didn't appreciate back then is how hard growing up would be.